1. |
Echo
01:34
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alone again
scribbling words on a piece of paper
what's the fucking point?
no sympathy
from the loved ones i've pushed away
so i try to find it here instead
instead of getting help, i play the writer
the actor
director
of a show no one sees
i cry out these words
like i need to be heard
there is only an echo
i'm screaming at an empty room.
i'm wasting my time, i'm wasting my life
and as i try so pathetically
yelling at nowhere
a voice calls back,
"is anyone there?"
i said, "no
just me."
no one, just me.
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2. |
Loathing
02:47
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look at what i've become
look at what i made myself
from everyone i shy away
i know the warmth, but i've been burnt
well always said it was better to
burn out than fade away
and i think that so far
i've done a great job
why would they save me?
after what i've done
i ruin friendships and bury lovers
because they knew too much
everyone can see me, up on stage,
burning at both ends
everyone can see how hallowed i've become
i cry and scream, too far gone.
crashing and burning.
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3. |
Loving
02:10
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the show's over and curtain's drawn
so why am i still reading the lines?
every word you said is stuck in my head
with the ones i never did
and i burned down with the best of it
but you never took no for an answer
maybe it didn't have to end this way
if i wanted to be saved
why can't i let go of the past?
it has let go of me
ever-present are missed chances
for happiness between your sheets
why can't i let go of the past?
it has let go of me
and all the souls my body rejected
i crave, i crave, i crave
i need to stop pretending i'm an island
when i'm so hopelessly landlocked
i'm always here
i stay up late
and i know you probably hate me
but you're welcome back any time
i'll be a voice
i'll be an ear
i'll be a shoulder
and a lover's embrace
consider this an apology
consider me
i hope you still do
i consider you
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4. |
Indisposed
01:33
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there will always be
room for you and me
between these four walls
who have seen no face at all
but the one that we shared
the mask that doesn't care
our feigned apathy, a joke
on the same breath we choke
we are the same sick
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5. |
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you're gone
made your exit
you wouldn't look at me
if i begged for it, i would
and as the smoke clears
it's a disappearing act
with no one to commiserate, stuck inside the place i hate
the emptiness is me where i'm holding the match
so sick
of apologies
but i haven't paid my debts
to the ghosts, to the dreams
and if i fall asleep
i'll see you in the trees
succumb to the dreams, of a better place and time
more than the tears or screams, regret is eating me alive.
instead of sowing seeds for the hard times ahead
i have learned nothing and try to do it all again
and as i run away, all of this an act
the lenses around my ankles have worn and cracked
i miss everything.
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6. |
The Forest
07:18
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i'm running into the arms of the trees
i'm chasing the sounds and i'm on my knees
escaping my shadow, denial and exile
this is how i live reminding myself not to
remember. these nails in the back
of my eyes are a constant. each thought
ruins me and i rub the sockets
as if to reach in and pull them out
pull me out.
the forest goes on forever.
no flora, no fauna, only monsters.
beware, turn back, stay away
beware, no light shines through the canopy
where do you go when your home becomes your prison?
when the roof over your head caves in
you're lost, not wandering
you're lost, not wandering
and you dig yourself deeper, deeper
forced
to live
on the streets
that you hate
share the gutter
with vagrants
blissfully
ignorant
thought you
were better
than this
but your pedestal
is a hospital bed
and the pill
the cure
is hard
to swallow
so choke
or languish
choke
or languish
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